The player is a person(male or female) who’s been in the dating game for a long time, and has learnt all the rules; knowing what works and what doesn’t. He or she knows how to pick a vulnerable mate, manipulate them, get what they want and move on to another prospect.
This is the core of what players are like. But, make no mistake, a player can be very fun to be with.
As a master of the game, he or she has learnt how to change the atmosphere at any given time; from boring to extreme fun. In fact, they’re willing to create the right moment to strike.
For a male, he knows his target and keeps to time. Once he gets his food, he moves on to the next catch, leaving you empty.
For the female, she knows how to utilize all her flirting. She’s learnt over the years that men are s*xual creatures; and she plans to use that to her advantage. Pulling him out of his circle, she manipulates him, gets what she wants and leaves him vulnerable. To her it’s life. Life is a game afterall.
So, if you’re looking for a stable relationship, you need to learn how to choose your mate quickly or face the risk of being used, dumped and trampled upon.
There are some sure characteristics that will give a player away instantly if you put your mind to observing how they operate. Here are some ideas :-
1. Early Intentions : A player has got no time to waste. So, from the onset, a player is already throwing his sweetest lines on you. They may even make their intentions known to you and claim it’s a mistake or slip of the tongue. You’ll hear something like : ‘I want to f*ck you. Sorry k*ss you. I didn’t mean that really? They didn’t mean that but it just escaped their mouth?
A player can even throw up that line in just 5 minutes of meeting you. So you have to pay close attention to their choice of words to know who they are.
2. They play to your fantasy : This is an easy one. Once a player knows your needs and what you really lack, they’ll try to manipulate you by making promises to help you get things.
Most times, they never fulfill their promises.
3. They entice with their vanity : Just like the above, A player can flaunt money, body, car, house or other vanities they think can entice you. Once you are enticed, they entice you more and more until you’re sunk with no other option but to give in.
4. They can intimidate you : Most players have big personalities. Once they notice you’re smarting on them, they put you in a corner and try to intimidate you. If you’re new to the game, you may fall for this.
5. They’re not usually focused : Always on the phone. Chatting, calling, texting, checking the time or even looking out the window. Players are pre-occupied with getting more game; and you’ll notice this if you observe.
6. They want you drunk everytime : This is simple. Anyone who wants you drunk or “in a high” every time probably do not want you thinking right. You’re being manipulated. Run.
7. They don’t want to meet your family : Players don’t have time for meetings; not to talk of seeing your family. If your mate isn’t interested in meeting your family, then the person is probably playing you. This is common sense.
8. They use your friends to manipulate you : They know your friends share the same interests as you. So, they do everything possible to have them close. If one or two of your friends are unnecessarily pushing you consistently to consider a mate, then you may have to look closely to be sure they’re not being tipped to do the job. If you’re pushed, it may be a game.
9. They have no plan for you : Ask a player what plans they have for you or for your future together and you’ll hear all sort of excuses like : ‘Let’s just enjoy the moment’, ‘I love you, you love me. That’s the most important thing’. You can see they’re begging the question while playing to your fantasy, trying not to give a straight answer.
That’s the breaking point. If he or she cannot give a straight answer then they’re not as concerned about the relationship as you are. You’re probably being played.
10. They are addicts(sometimes, secret addicts) : The fact remains that 90 percent of the players are addicts. Clubbing, drinking, smoking, womanizing, s*xing. Just name them. If you notice one of these signs and still remain glued to a relationship that is going nowhere, then you’re doing so at your own peril. Players don’t change.
*Bonus* They make you feel jealous : Just imagine a guy or lady in the habit of flirting with the opposite s*x in the presence of his lover. Sound familiar? If he or she is consciously making efforts to keep you jealous, then it simply means you are being played. Run.